Saturday, August 05, 2006

Manual Labor Is NOT the President of Mexico

Peace and love.

I took the day off yesterday. It was a productive day that involved brick, gravel, sand, rocks, and me spending a lot of time on my knees. What? No, no, no. As a matter of fact, I was not auditioning for a gay porn flick about landscapers. But....I could definitely have fun with titles for the series:

“Manscapers – Layin’ Pipe”
“Manscapers II – Plant It Here”
“Manscapers III – Clean the Mud off that Tool”

Made some clam chowder yesterday evening. It was dee-licious. The Boy said it was better than a really good seafood restaurant here in town. The Girl doesn’t like clam chowder, but vowed to try it before it's gone. The Warden was out with her sister yesterday evening and hasn’t tried it yet.

I have the three doggies trained. If I see them doing something naughty, or if they’re yappin’ at squirrels (That awful, high-pitched, "Ooooh look! There's a squirrel" yelp), I simply rap a knuckle on a window or the sliding glass door and they dutifully trot to their house and lie down.

Today The Warden’s brother and family are coming over for dinner. The Warden’s cooking if you can believe that! And yes, there really is rain forecast for tomorrow.


Memory du Jour:
Phoenix, Arizona, circa 1980
Speaking of landscaping...
Long ago, in a far away land, my best friend Mike got me a job working with him at a landscaping company. We figured we’d make some money and have a shitload (I finally added shitload to my dictionary this morning, finally tiring of the red, squiggly line) of fun. The night before my first day on the job we celebrated. We celebrated with some variety of alcohol and some tasty doobs. The cherry on top was a very potent hallucinogen. We stayed up all night. I remember none of it.

We reported to work the next day, having gotten zero sleep. The foreign substances in our bloodstreams were still working our brain, albeit the effects were fading. I was introduced to some of the bosses and supervisors, and then we were promptly split into different crews (smart bosses). We were bummed.

Before I knew it I was in the back of a Ford pickup truck, with a couple of Mexican workers (from Mexico, not Mexican Americans) and a couple of other dudes. I was sitting on the wheel well hating life, hating myself, and hating how fucked up the day was going to be. While I was hating, the scrawny Mexican guy who was sitting with his back against the cab picked up a shovel. He held it, business end up, looked at me, and declared, ”Thees showvel; eat ease your desteenee.”

I don’t remember my reaction, or if I even acknowledged he’d said something. I just remember that what he’d said seemed extremely profound. Why? I have no idea, but I remember it very clearly. I remember his straw hat, his smile, and the laugh. I hope I don’t think about him when I die.

That day’s work was performed on the grounds of a brand new telephone company complex in Goodyear. It was extremely hot – Somewhere in the neighborhood of 110 degrees. The first job the site foreman gave me was to dig a sprinkler pipe trench, 3 inches wide by 4 or so inches deep, across 200 or so feet of asphalt. Did it suck? Most indubitably so. We also planted a shitload of 25 gallon olive trees that day. I was no stranger to manual labor back then, but this day sucked prolifically. Needless to say, I didn’t go to work for that company the next day, or ever for that matter. I just went in for my check. Now, every time I see landscapers working in the hot Texas sun, I take a trip back in time.

Quote of the Day:
"We shouldn't fear a world that is more interacted." — George W. Bush, Washington, D.C., June 27, 2006

Graphic Du Jour – Chicken Sandwich


The_Gator said...

mmmmm crispy chicken sandwich......i like you decided to retire early from manual labor, Its just not worth the pain and suffering if you can avoid it.

So tell us about the rain and the flooding?

I love it when i post a picture of boobies on my blog and no one shows up to comment the entire time i was in orlando!

jules said...

The Mexican with the shovel sounded suspiciously like Darth Vader.

Sheila said...

I love clam chowder. Share your recipe!

Lol on your MDJ. So were you thinking about the shovel being your "desteenee" while working on your home project? How funny!

George was right on with his quote - we shouldn't fear a world that is more "interacted" - instead, we should all fear the "World of George"! lol What a moron.

Webmiztris said...

lol at the Mexican 'fortune teller'! I hope he was wrong about the shovel being your destiny cuz, man, that would suck!

Bunny ~N~ Early said...

Early loved the name for the landscaping porn series, too funny.
Memory du Jour:
We were tough back then. I don't recall any of us even having air conditioning in our cars back then, yet we were always cruising around stoned no matter how hot or how hangover. Makes me ill just thinking about it now.

Karlos said...

Gagor: No rain to speak of here. It’s all in El Paso. Houston & Beaumont got a fair share too. We get crap. We (my neighborhood, that is) got dumped on by a little black cloud on Sunday, but that’s it.

Jules: Darth Vader! I thought his voice was familiar!

Sheila: I’ll post the recipe soon. It really was good. As a matter of fact, I did think about that damned Mexican when I was doing my home project. Kinda funny actually. I wonder if the guy could ever have imagined that the kid in the back of the truck with him would never forget him. Disturbing.

WebMiz: Oh, he was wrong....very wrong. And I’m very grateful!

Y: You’re right...we were tough back then. I'm with ya... get heatstroke just thinking about the hours and hours we used to spend drinking and getting high in the 110/115 degree heat. These days I can do the heat only if I’m within jumping distance of a body of water.