Sunday, May 24, 2009


While Shelley was in the hospital, I had the opportunity to spy a couple of human oddities of interest.

The first was at the local, small supermarket. I was in the checkout line and saw a woman in the adjacent checkout lane who looked just exactly like you’d imagine someone buying the things she was buying should look. She had on a dreadful, thrift store tank top, some cheap cut-off jean shorts, flip flops; and she was about as big as an Amazon, but not as sexy as I’d think an Amazon should be - and with stringy, oily hair.

In one hand she had a twelve-pack of Lone Star beer; in the other she had a one-liter bottle of Night Train Express. I was stunned. Until then, I’d only seen people like her in movies and television sitcoms like My Name is Earl. I fumbled with my camera phone, but was too slow; the wily creature had already placed her items on the conveyer belt and was out of my line of sight. But close your eyes for a moment - it’ll come to you.

I sighted the next specimen on the highway driving between San Antonio and our fair town. It was a pickup truck (would you expect to see much of anything else in Rural Texas?). Emblazoned on the back window of the cab was a huge Marine Corps Emblem and text below it that read USMC JESUS FREAK.

If that weren’t scary enough, a day or so later I saw that same truck parked in the little employee parking lot of our local post office. If I were writing a short story about a small-town guy who one day snapped and killed a dozen or so people, this is what I would write him to drive. ;-)


flyinfox-satx said...

That is scary....

The_Gator said...

The first one I can easily picture. It is disturbing.

The only thing that bothers me with the second one is Jesus Freak. Even if you are a wack job bible thumper, you dont have to advertise it. Let alone next to the E.G.A.