Saturday, January 31, 2009

Saturday

Why is that moron Ted Haggard still making news? You might remember him as the televangelist fuck who condemned fags, dykes, and anyone else who wasn’t who or what he thought they should be. Then, after all that, he gets dimed by a gay (and I don’t mean happy) prostitute for gobbling cock and meth.

Ted Haggard has a new “documentary” out that attributes his affinity for blue-veiners to sexual abuse. Who the fuck cares why Ted likes cock? I sure don’t, and I’m sure he doesn’t care why I like vagina, right? Why the hell does anyone care what anyone else likes - genitalia, vegetables, cars or otherwise?

Interestingly, Haggard was declared “completely heterosexual” by minister Tim Ralph after intensive “counseling” by a group of four ministers.

Wow. I wonder if I can make an appointment with those idiots to have them declare me a millionaire.

Katrina Blows
And I ain’t talkin’ about the hurricane.

It seems an arrogant twat named Katrina Jerkoff Smirnoff, of Dancing With The Stars “fame,” is suing a local restaurant here in San Antonio because they didn’t pay her $6,000 for her appearance at a charity event at the restaurant. That’s right. Pay, for a fucking charity event. Amazing.

According to her lame web site, she “has a dream of bringing the understanding of music through the body to underprivileged children and to a wider audience.” I wonder how much she’s gonna charge for that. And what exactly the fuck does that mean? That makes about as much sense as teaching the understanding of the mambo through the slide guitar.

By the way dear readers, Panchitos is an awesome little Mexican joint near Hildebrand and McCullough here in San Antonio. I used to go to it when it was just a tiny place that seated no more than twenty or so people. Go there for breakfast. And if you decide to go during a charity event, contribute something … for free.

3 comments:

TC said...

I find it interesting that those who blast homosexuals the loudest are often just not out of the closet themselves...

What a beyotch! Charity - you give it away. You don't get paid for it. Geez.

Woozie said...

VW Beetles are sexy.

Anonymous said...

Using the word twat to describe this bitch is being far to kind.

Tripping